What is that happening to me.Things that I fear might happen in my life always happens to me.May be its the reverse.I always end up doing things which I don't want to and the law of Karma strikes backs:-"He that sows iniquity will reap sorrow" .

Whether its sorrow or happiness depends on how I take it?What is sorrow..what is happiness?Consider my five senses-Aren't they taught what is happiness and what is sorrow,what is good and what is bad.Leave the sense of taste aside.May be it brings a feeling of happiness without even being taught.Lets take

the sense of vision.Why do somethings appear beautiful and others not.We think somethings are beautiful because its taught to us by our elders that they are beautiful.Why do do flowers appear beautiful.Apart from the scent ,what are flowers.Just papery materials with different colour mixtures.Are colours real?I don't think so.As per the laws of reflect a body absorbs its colours and reflects the colours which its not belonging to its spectrum.What humans see is the reflected colours.Hence What we see as black is actually white and what we see as white is actually black.The whole concept of beauty seems stupid to me..:).A small baby ,may be six to seven months old,doesn't even know what is beautiful and what is ugly.he smiles at everything,everyone.He is happy to see anyone who takes him in his hand and cares for him.He is not taught the wrong lessons of this world.I remember one thoughts for the day which frequently appeared in our school assemblys:-"Beauty is not what I can see.A beautiful person is one who is kind,loving and polite".I didn't quite understand those word in my lower classes,but I think those are very meaningful words now.

Isn't the sense of sound also shaped by the influence from others.Why do different people have different taste of music.Myself I didn't like most of the songs which I like most now when I heard the first time.After hearing a couple of times and after many people telling that the song is good I have started liking it.Animals lick their excretory organs,their wounds and everything that smells bad to clean themselves.I believe animals,especially dogs ,have greater olfactory senses than human.If those smells were considered to be bad ,why do they do lick themselves??I think we humans are taught the wrong lessons from the very beginning.We have been guided in the wrong direction.What about the sense of touch ?Let me give this example from my own life.When I was a small boy I didn't like women kissing me.I didn't even liked touch of a girl because even if I accidently touched a girl my esteem infront of my friends will lower.But most of the women used to kiss me and hug me when I was a small kid,but I didn't protest eventhough I didn't like it.May be because I was afraid of my moms
scoldings.Now the situation has changed.The world is so cruel.I want to kiss every women but no one agrees : )

i think I have gone mad over speaking about senses and have deviated from the main topic of sorrow and happiness and the cause of sorrow always happening to me.May be the elders have misguided me in differentiating between what is happiness and what is sorrow in the same way they have misguided my senses.There is a saying that Life is 10% what you make it and 90% how you take it.I have taken it in the wrong sense.My ange of viewing the life is wrong and that is why I am sad.I always feel the worst happens to me because I look upon the people above me.It is true that if I want to rise in your life I should look upon top people but sometimes I should look down.I should understand that there are worser people than me in this world.

Have written down all the madness in my mind at the current time.I think Iam going mad but I am feeling happy.I don;t want anyone to read it and try to understand my poor grammar and poor English.I am not responsible for anyone who reads it.I have written this for myself so that I may read it future and remember how mad I was.:)